What does it mean to be a successful person?
"Success" is a subjective and evolving variable. Each person must question themselves, more than once in life: What does "success" mean to me in this moment of my life? Feeling successful is what truly makes us self-fulfilled individuals.
Success must be differentiated from fame, as we can be externally recognized but internally frustrated individuals. The key is to feel successful through self-improvement, which requires stepping out of our comfort zone. By moving beyond our comfort zone, we achieve new learnings and unfold as individuals, expanding our identity. This dynamic view of personality involves letting go of the notion of "This is who I am" and embracing "This is who I am becoming". We are processes rather than finished products. We are rivers, not stagnant water. If we stagnate, we lose motivation. When we lack reasons to take action (motiv/ation), we become stuck, and the risks of apathy and depression increase. We feel successful when we broaden our identity as much as possible: trying things we hadn't before, taking on new roles, learning something new, letting go of old habits, transcending conditioning.
We feel successful when we broaden our identity as much as possible: trying things we hadn't before, taking on new roles, learning something new, letting go of old habits, transcending conditioning.
Understanding success as an "attitude of conquest" towards life's challenges moves us away from a materialistic view, where success is often reduced to achieving results that may leave us feeling alienated. The definition of success is personal and should detach from society's imposed norms. What society proposes as success tends to alienate us more than it liberates us. Like mice on a wheel, we get dizzy chasing what, once achieved, is no longer valued.We need to filter the variable of "success" through a personal lens. In this way, a person may feel tremendously successful because they quit smoking, learned a new language, controlled an impulse, or overcame an addiction.
We need to filter the variable of "success" through a personal lens. In this way, a person may feel tremendously successful because they quit smoking, learned a new language, controlled an impulse, or overcame an addiction.
I would speak of success in the plural and say that they are... "those intimate battles won, which provide us everyday self-confidence to pursue new feats."
Feeling successful involves learning to deal with frustration.
If feeling successful involves stepping out of the comfort zone, it is essential to learn to deal with disappointment and frustration.
Winston Churchill, Nobel laureate in literature, once said: "Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm." This expression resembles the image of a person strolling through life, learning to navigate difficulties rather than striving for an illusory promise of happiness. There is no distant success that we must reach; there are successful people who feel this way because they adopt an attitude of constant self-improvement. Those who don't take risks won't win, and the measure of satisfaction in life is directly related to the efforts we make to feel comfortable with it.
Those who reinvent themselves quickly embark on a new hope. Thus, after a disappointment, a new self-improvement follows. There is nothing threatening about frustration if we add the realization that nothing is in vain, and we always conquer new learning in the art of "reassembling" ourselves after a fall.
A life of success is not solely based on inspiration; 80% of it is perspiration. This partly explains why seemingly successful people feel undervalued.
Why do seemingly successful people feel undervalued?
Two possible explanations can account for this experience of "emptiness."
1- Firstly, some individuals pursue externally defined goals. Family conditioning and social mandates sometimes obscure our vision and silence our inner voice. In this way, we chase after carrots that are not truly ours, and when we finally take a bite, we don't like the taste.
2- Secondly, some people are placed on stage without having worked on the "script," without experiencing the emotion behind the scenes. Children of "successful" parents who, in comfort, do not have the opportunity to test their own capabilities. It is a borrowed success that is not fully experienced. Adding personal "value" to it can be an opportunity to feel a sense of belonging and inner satisfaction.
Success does not allow for comparison because it does not involve outdoing anyone else. If we fall into that trend, we start looking sideways and lose sight of our own aspirations.
What does being successful mean to me today?
Remember also the updatable nature of this concept. What once motivated us may no longer be what drives us today. Having the courage to reevaluate "what I want" and "where I am" is part of defining "where I am going."
We are in constant movement, and it is possible that "what used to be YES, is no longer." Rectifying our direction does not imply contradiction; instead, it means abandoning the human omnipotence and arrogance of pretending to always have things "clear."
Confusion is part of the questioning process, and those who question are much closer to feeling successful in their lives. They orient their values and actions towards what truly motivates them.
Here I offer you some suggestions to consider
- Recognize the highly subjective nature of success's definition.
- Dare to ask oneself, "What does success mean to me?"
- Stop viewing "success" as an abstract, ideal, and distant concept and begin to see it in practical, everyday, and achievable terms.
- Think of success in terms of plurality. A successful life is the sum of small personal victories, of successes that accumulate and forge self-confidence and real self-worth.
- Acknowledge its dynamic and changing nature. Update its definition through inner dialogue.
And don't forget...before embarking on your journey to success, don't forget to ask yourself, "What battles do I need to win to feel like a successful person?"